Today

The shower serves as my psychiatrist's chaise.  Today, I summited one of many peaks. 

Why do you bring up the past?  Why do you always remind yourself of these hurtful things? 
          Because it reminds me that I am not good enough.
Ignoring the obvious question of who told you that in the first place, let's instead evaluate how bringing these things up makes you feel.
          Bad.  Angry, worthless, disgusting...
And so what do you get from reminding yourself that you are worthless and disgusting?  That you are not good enough?
          Nothing.  No.  Not nothing.  I get to get me before someone else does.  I get to release myself from the responsibility of accomplishment.  Because if I am not good enough, then there is no point in trying.  And if I don't try, then it is expected that I will fail.  And if I succeed, I am fortunate.  That way, I won't be hurt if I fail, and I can be pleasantly surprised without responsibility if I succeed.  I get protection.  And I get a pass to coast through life never having tried anything.

Good.  And so what, in turn, do you get from not experiencing the satisfaction of having tried really hard and have something succeed?
           Nothing.  Just protection.  But, I want to feel satisfaction.  I want to feel good enough.  I am good enough.  I have seen it.  I am good enough and because I am good enough, I succeed.
 

Great.  That's enough for today.  Shower goes off and on to your day~

To Speak is To Learn

We can understand the world only through the language that is at our disposal.  Change our language, learn more of our own and we can come to learn more of ourselves.

This forum can be used as a confession for your mind.   When others hear us, they respond in their unique language.  In hearing their response, our reaction to ourselves can morph into something new.  Sometimes, that "other" can be found in ourselves by examining something from a different angle.